Tuesday, March 21, 2006

The dog house

I want a dog. I need a dog. I spend copious amounts of time alone, on the couch, with out anyone to warm my lap. Not that my husband doesn't offer, but until the hair in his ears grows a little longer and he can hang his tongue out of his mouth for at least two minutes straight, I am going to pass on his offer. Which leads me back to wanting a four legged, furry critter I can call my own.

The problem with this, is my hubby hates all animals. Yes,*shudder*, he is one of those. He grew up on a farm, so unless an animal serves a purpose, i.e. you can eat it, he thinks all animals are wastes of oxygen. How I managed to marry him, knowing this, is beyond me. (Must have had something to do with me being pregnant with our second child at the time, and my father's angry looks.)

But to pacify me, because he loves me so, the hubs has relented. He granted me permission. Or at least, that's what he likes to think. The reality is, I have already talked to a breeder, placed an order and am waiting for the birth of my couch cuddler. All the while, I have been whispering sweet doggy love thoughts into his ear as he sleeps the day away. The perils of working at night, and being home alone, sleeping all day, unprotected from your bored wife.

I digress. To prove my doggie devotion, I have offered to puppy-sit this week for my brother and his woman, while they travel to far away places to spread the sweet melodic tunes of his death metal band. My mother is so proud. I'm am the proud aunty/sitter for a soon to be over-grown, speckled, white german shepard/husky cross, named Pink Meat.

What I didn't anticipate is the constant whining, scratching, puking and potty accidents of a puppy. Yes, I know, dear internet, it is a puppy. But it is not my puppy. There is a difference. I will love my puppy no matter what. This puppy, I have to give back. Why get attached? And, if it pee's on my floor one more time when the kids come into the room, I am going to make the damn puppy clean it up.

Meanwhile, my husband is grinning like some cat with a canary in it's mouth, and muttering something about "I told you so, worthless mutt...." I wonder, who is he referring to? Me or Pink?


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks you remineded me why I don't want a puppy!

12:45 p.m.  
Blogger MrsFortune said...

See! That's why you should adopt a somewhat OLDER dog from a shelter. Ahem. Not to preach or anything. Uh, wait, yeah, I guess ... :-) You could still get a cuddler.

2:09 p.m.  
Blogger Mom101 said...

when we first got our puppy, I broke down and cried onto the phone to my mother, "I can't do this! I will never be able to have children!" She assured me that having a puppy was tougher than having a kid. And maybe she was just trying to get me through it...but ya know, in a way she was right!

3:38 p.m.  
Blogger Abandoned in Pasadena said...

Well, I hope you get your cuddler and it bonds with you and not your husband.

8:22 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hsving lost my "best friend" of 14 years, I pine for another puppy... the love of a doggy is unconditional.

9:01 p.m.  
Blogger se7en said...

I love dogs myownself, I've always had one since I was a child. I wish I had one now, it's just impossible for me at the moment with the living conditions here in N.O and everything being so unstable.

Dog poop though is something i hate dealing with and training a puppy can be nightmarish! LOL

I was visiting my GF in NYC a couple weeks ago and I fell in love with her pooch and took it out for walks several times in Manhattan where she lives. I did NOT pick up poop though! LOL I think my GF was a bit miffed because I was breaking the LAW! *GASP* LOLOL

9:06 p.m.  
Blogger Lisa said...

I love having a dog around. We got Abbey as a pup and she's been around for seven years now. Truthfully, there are days when I like her alot more than my son. heehee. SHE doesn't talk back.

9:52 p.m.  
Anonymous jess said...

puppies are awesome and difficult, not unlike kids. i'm really happy for you! what kind of puppy?

10:52 a.m.  
Blogger T. said...

A Boston Terrier. Just to annoy my hubby. And because it will fit on my lap.

Apparently, they let out man sized farts. Should be fun.

3:55 p.m.  
Anonymous Terri said...

I JUST got a puppy last Sunday...photos on my blog. How true...whimpering, peeing, constant trips to the back yard...but OH how he's worth it!
I'm stealing your great cartoon here of the puppy and giving you credit on my blog this coming week. Hope you don't mind!
Love your blog and will be back to visit often. I'm anxious to hear about YOUR new pup!

11:02 a.m.  

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