In an effort to look sophisticated and scholarly, I recently purchased a new pair of eyeglasses. I usually wear contacts, but I am becoming increasingly lazy as of late. I seem to be spending inordinate amounts of time picking my nose.
I proudly wore them last night for the first time. I was giddy with excitement, waiting for the hubs to see me and be bowled over by my new found sexiness. However, fantasy is always better than reality.
Me: "Well Boo, do you like my new glasses?" (All the while thinking I shouldn't have had to ask.)
Hubs: "The important thing is do you like your new glasses?"
Me (also known as the Redneck Fool): "That's not what I asked. Don't avoid the question. Say something, I promise I won't get mad." (Also known as a wife blatantly lying.)
Hubs: "Mom always told me if I have nothing nice to say to keep my mouth shut. I am choosing to heed her wisdom."
Let's just say my dear hubs is still picking feathers out of his teeth from the pillow I crammed in his mouth. And yes, I do like my glasses, thank you very much. Even if he doesn't.