Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Warning: This Post is Not Pretty

I learned something new last night.

I've decided to impart this new wisdom to you, dear internet, in the hopes that you will take this knowledge and use it for personal growth and well, if nothing else, just a bit of trivia to carry about inside your head.

Imagine this, if you will: Sleeping in the buff, with a little dog on top of the covers, right next to you.

Naked boobs with rings dangling from the ends of said boobs. Puppy toenails in dire need of a trim.

Puppy nails catching on dangling hoops. Puppy excited and trying to extricate himself from a web of metal.

Instant wake up call.

Can we say "Ouch?"

Lesson learned. Please be advised.


Blogger J. said...

I think I just heard my own nipples scream in terror.

10:40 a.m.  
Blogger Her Bad Mother said...

Goddam, woman. I'm clutching at my chest over here, shuddering with horror at the idea that there is a worse fate for the nips than a bad latch.

Nixon *is* out to prove that he can do more damage than any Wonderbaby, no?

10:42 a.m.  
Blogger bubandpie said...

This post is a great companion to the post i-obsess awarded for the ROFLs - it was by a daddy-blogger whose toddler accidentally bit him in the balls (do I need to put "accidentally" there?). Anyhow, aware that he's addressing at least a partially female audience, he points out that if we are responding with a mild, "Oh, that must be painful" we really DO NOT GET IT (the appropriate response, as I recall, involves rolling around on the floor in a semi-catatonic state).

Anyhow. I'm rocking back and forth here, clutching my chest in agony on her behalf. Ouch.

1:17 p.m.  
Blogger jellyhead said...


2:37 p.m.  
Blogger My float said...

Yeowwww. Lucky they were just rings on your nipples and not other bits. Heh, heh.

3:13 p.m.  
Blogger L-Girl said...

No way. That had to hurt like a &*@#&$^%!*. I'm holding my boobs just thinking about it!

4:23 p.m.  
Blogger stefanierj said...

Oh MYMYMYMY. The thing is, the puppy still lives, yes? That's the true miracle here.

4:37 p.m.  
Blogger Lillithmother said...

Having had my one nipple pierced years ago, I can vividly imagine your whole experience...erm, thanks for sharing?? hehe

6:54 p.m.  
Blogger kimmyk said...

OMG...You sassy thang you.

I didn't know your nipples were pierced.


I have fake boobie rings cause I'm too much of a chicken shit to do the real thing. Youre my idol.

Oh yeah, sorry to hear your dog caught his nails in your rings. Does your dog stick his nose up your butt at night when you're sleeping like that? See that's a problem in these here parts. Yes, my ass smells like roses tyvm.

7:22 p.m.  
Blogger dennis said...

i'm sorry, you lost me at naked in bed with boobs showing...


That would HURT!!

8:28 p.m.  
Blogger Mrs. Chicky said...

Note to self: Don't get a nipple ring if planning on sleeping naked with dogs.

Okay, got it. Thanks for the public service notice.

8:58 a.m.  
Blogger ~*~ D ~*~ said...

My nipples hurt just reading that!

12:05 p.m.  
Blogger Abandoned in Pasadena said...

OUCH...that had to hurt!!!

4:38 p.m.  
Blogger B.E.C.K. said...

*Cringe* and *Cringe* and *Cringe*

(Um, ow.)

4:18 a.m.  

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